Holy Cow!

Author(s): Ryan
Location: New Jersey

"“Holy Cow!: Loosely Based On a Surprisingly (I Promise You) True Story”

Directed by Adam McKay
Written by Adam McKay & Will Ferrell
Music by Alex Wurman

Principal Cast:

Kal Penn (Safwat Mikadesh)
Will Ferrell (Judge Alex Owens)
Sarah Silverman (voice of: Haley Cow)
Tina Fey (Judy Young)
Amy Pohler (Janey Young)
Amy Sedaris (Mallory Tate)
Chelsea Handler (Kelsey Ian)
Paul Newman (as Himself)
Keenan Thompson (John Thorton)
Jennifer Tilly (Amanda Needy)
Dane Cook (Ashton Limer)
Sacha Baron Cohen (Christina)
Jack Nicholson (Max Green)
Ashton Kutcher (Dax Maler)

Tagline: "Every Year There is a Film That Will Offend Everyone. This is it.” 8/31/07

RATED R- for Pervasive language, sexual references, drug references and a scene of carnage.

Synopsis: When a Indian train conductor, Safwat Mikadesh (Kal Penn), sees a cow, Haley Cow (voiced by Sarah Silverman), he stops the train, because cows are sacred in India. However, this causes the train to crash and everybody dies except Safwat. Safwat now faces the Supreme Court with life vs. religion. Judge Alex Owens (Will Ferrell) is the judge of this case, however his wife just left him and he is still dizzy from the drugs he did last night. During the case we hear testimonies from the spirits of the dead passengers played by Siamese twins Judy and Janey Young (Tina Fey and Amy Pohler), herbalist Mallory Tate (Amy Sedaris), rock band groupie Kelsey Ian (Chelsea Handler), pregnant alcoholic mother Amanda Needy (Jennifer Tilly), wannabee gangsta’ rapper John Thorton (Kennan Thompson), suicidal ticket taker Ashton Limer (Dane Cook), disorderly drunk Max Green (Jack Nicholson), male transvestite prostitute Christina (Sacha Baron Cohen), and male model Dax Maler (Ashton Kutcher). We also hear testimony from the Cow, Haley Cow (voiced by Sarah Silverman). Or is the crash to be blamed by Paul Newman (as Himself) for letting his cow get out? One of the most hilarious Oscar worthy films ever! And if you see it, you’re a racist!

What the press would say:

"Two shamefully thumbs up!”-Ebert & Roeper
“Made as a joke, but turns out as a superb one!”- People
“A+! Sure to be the most Controversial Oscar Winner EVER!”-Entertainment Weekly
“Racist, hilarious, and Oscar Worthy.”-Rolling Stone Magazine

Holy Cow!, is a film to be envied. From one stand-point is Oscar gold, from another it is a low budget, hilarious, ridiculous, and racist film lower than Jackass: Number Two. Holy Cow! Is like a played out SNL skit that truly does work. Every performance is at it’s best and every line is brilliant. Will Ferrell truly will be remembered for his role as the Judge whose wife left and is still dizzy from the drugs he took the night before he left. Especially Jennifer Tilly’s character as the Alcoholic pregnant mother. All the characters are remember able and unique in every way. Whether Siamese twins or suicidal ticket takers Holy Cow!: Loosely Based on A Surprisingly (I Swear to You) True Story.

Best Picture
Best Director: Adam McKay
Best Screenplay: Adam McKay & Will Ferrell
Best Original Score: Alex Wurman
Best Actor: Kal Penn, Paul Newman, Will Ferrell
Best Supporting Actor: Ashton Kutcher, Dane Cook, Sacha Baron Cohen
Best Actress: Sarah Silverman
Best Supporting Actress: Jennifer Tilly, Chelsea Handler